Outage Alert : bluff32.hostbluff.com is online due to Astroglide Spill [RESOLVED]
Attention All HostBluff Customers,
We are aware that bluff32.hostbluff.com has been put online 24 minutes ago. Upon an investigation by our tech, it appears that some Astroglide Personal Lubricant was smeared all over the server. We have spoken to the only 2 staff members who were in the Datacenter (Zach and Jacob) who appear to also be surprised by our findings. We have unplugged the server and will be burning it later this afternoon as it smells of shame.
Security Officer #007 - James Daniels
After reviewing the security logs, it looks like an employee #495 – Zach C. Nelson attempted to make love with the server. After sodomizing himself with the power cord, all security personnel had to turn away, because it was just that gross. Anyone interested in viewing the logs should seek immediate medical attention.
admin
Sir, you are one sick nutcase
HostBluff Employee #495 Zach C. Nelson
I just had an orgasim. Sexy. Server. Can. Not. Resist.
Baconator
LMFAO! You can never have too much Astroglide.
ZCN
I can confirm that the machine accidentally was put online today. After generous applications of astroglide, a HB ritual, a tech was violently thrusted towards a server. This overly abundant manly thrust from behind caused someone (not naming names) to slide forward, and in a last resort effort to catch himself from falling a server was accidentally switched on. causing this unforseen uptime.