Attention all HostBluff Customers. About an hour ago, I unlocked the doors to our support desk cell and noticed that everyone was missing. I sounded the perimeter alarm and released the hounds. There is a strange smell in the air.

Update 2:32 PM – One of our guards reported that all of the vending machines have been broken into and robbed of all salty snacks including the Cheetos, Doritos and Ho Hos.

Update 2:55 PM – Our lead sniper just reported back saying that the numbers “420” have been written on all o the bathroom mirrors. We are still investigating the meaning of this strange text.

Update 5:58 PM – Attention all HostBluff customers, our K9 unit reports that they have recovered our support staff. They were found in the basement of naked, playing Super Mario Brothers on an old Super Nintendo Entertainment System. It also appears that they wrapped the TV in a layer of bacon. We assure all customers that they will all return to their posts shortly, after a harsh beating .