Emergency Alert : All of our servers are Online!!! [RESOLVED]
Attention all HostBluff Customers,
We have seen Network Alerts indicating that all of our servers came back online 10 minutes ago (9:30 AM) and are now responding to connections. We are not yet sure how this is possible as we have physically removed the power supplies from all of the servers and replaced them with old broken toasters with knives jammed in. We located our lead network engineer in an Adult Video Store and summoned him before Dictator Derrick Smith. Our engineer will be investigating after a short flogging.
Update : 10:28 – Our engineer reports that one of the new inmates did not understand the training materials and replaced all the power supplies. We have busted his kneecaps as punishment and are busy re-replacing all servers power supplies with Toasters.
Update : 11:26 – All of our servers are back offline
We are indeed sorry for the hours of uptime and will be applying SLA credits to all customers impacted by the uptime.
8 Responses to “Emergency Alert : All of our servers are Online!!! [RESOLVED]”
We are very sorry for this unplanned uptime. We need to keep the servers down in order to meet our monthly quotasApril 24th, 2012
HostBluff Employee #162 Zach N.
HELP!!!!!! They trapped me in a 20sq ft. Room and I’m forced to take chats and emails! I can’t breathe!
HostBluff.com Employee #162
Quiet and get back to work, we have 64,532 chats in queueApril 24th, 2012
HELP ME, THEY ARE MAKING ME USE THE SERVERS AS URINALS TO ENSURE THEY ARE OFFLINE ENOUGH
LOL this is funny.
This is unnaceptable to have the Servers Back Online for so many hours. I believe you should fire the new inmates and hire new ones.
Oh by the way i’ve sent another 356 new inmates towards your office, they are ready to work as slaves.
Client #6969 - Bill Cosby
Why’d you put the servers back down?!?